Thursday, June 17, 2021
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You can’t hold a candle to long-term relationships

Never go into a relationship thinking it is going to be a fling or a short-term deal. If you think that, you’re wasting your time. And that’s the only important information in this article. You can stop reading now.

Lately, I’ve been finding out that people are becoming single or, conversely, going into a relationship. Maybe it is because they are graduating. Maybe it is because they aren’t. I think that is good, if they all think it is right for them. That’s the important thing, isn’t it?

Recently, I’ve been restarting a friendship with someone I used to date two years ago. Yeah, it’s been two years and there’s still something there (a flame from a candlestick, perhaps).

Now, I’m graduating in three months (oh shit, reality check). Anyway, this candlestick burns its wick as I decide what I should do.

Think back to the first statement: never go into a relationship thinking it is going to be a fling or a short-term deal.

I don’t care if it’s a friendship, business-ship or sexual tension-ship. Always consider long-term availability, but don’t suffocate yourself with it. The future hasn’t come yet. Deal with the now.

So my candlestick, there it is. What does this look like for me in the longterm? Good question. I usually wonder about this. That’s why I never dated in high school. That, or all the girls thought I was repulsive. We’ll pretend that the latter is false.

There is a future in everything; it’s just your perspective that determines if it is short-lived or a “Life-Long-Lesson-Learned.” That’s my “four-L” theory. If you can make anything into a “Life-Long-Lesson-Learned,” then you’re solid.

The candlestick still burns and I still wonder if I should get into this relationship or not. (I also wonder why I share this personal information with you, and maybe you wonder that, too.)

Is she right for me? Does she have the qualities I look for in a woman? Are our children going to be hot?

These are the kinds of stupid things that I think about during a wonderful lecture on strategic management at 2:00 p.m. on Tuesdays and Fridays.

I’m not saying I’m an advocate of daydreaming in class, I’m only saying I got my “four-L” two years ago, and you can see where my report card gets its good looks from. Or not!

Candlestick burns. Consider long-term. Deal with now. Oh, the analogies I can make. I love my wondrous ideas.

It’s not enough that we find new friends, get jobs and start going on dates. It’s only enough when we like our dates and I’ve got to tell you, folks, I don’t know how many people out there are completely satisfied with their relationships (platonic or sexual).

It pains me to see that people go on without wondering: What if this isn’t who I want to be? What if this isn’t the job I am looking for? What if this relationship is going nowhere?

Seriously, if it doesn’t live up to your expectations, why are you still putting up with it? I never settle for less. I’m a strong advocate for doing everything you need to do to get whatever it is you desire. Just don’t cross the line.

Never go into a relationship thinking it is going to be a fling or a short-term deal whether it be a friendship, business-ship or sexual tension-ship. Find the “Life-Long-Lesson-Learned.”

Go “four-L.”


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